Small Struggles, Big Lessons
Part 2 of "Letting Our Kids Sit With Discomfort"
This installment is Part 2 of this week’s “Letting Our Kids Sit With Discomfort” series. Read Part 1 here.
My daughter once wedged herself between the stool and the bar at our breakfast nook. She screamed, but there was no danger, so I crouched down and encouraged her to worm her way out.
The other night, my son struggled to take off his long-sleeve shirt at bedtime. He practically begged me to help.
"You can do it, buddy," I said. "Let's figure it out together."
He was pulling on the sleeves instead of the collar. After a quick demonstration, he yanked the shirt off himself and beamed with pride.
These tiny moments feel insignificant but aren't. Research shows that kids who solve small, everyday problems gain confidence for bigger challenges later.
In The Handbook of Resilience in Children, psychologists Brooks and Goldstein found that letting kids struggle within safe boundaries helps them build competence and independence.
Resist the urge to swoop in. Give your kids a chance to wrestle with small frustrations. Every tiny victory becomes part of their inner foundation of resilience.
Subscribe to see Part 3 Friday: The Long Game of Parenting